I swear someone snatched a day away from me - I keep thinking we're one day behind the actual date and it's been this way for almost a week now. Can't keep up with the days melting away, where do they go? All I do is try to sleep - mostly unsuccessfully - eat, watch tv, surf FB, do little chores around my place that I can handle. Sometimes I have enough energy to run some errands, like today. Mostly I am not accomplishing anything from my bucket list and I'm not proud of that. I'm just so damn tired all the time and the weather, well, it's more frightful than delightful for me until April so I'm gonna have to think outside the box here. Headaches don't help.
I almost feel guilty posting this but fuck it, that's what this blog is about. The underbelly of the beast. The weak part of me that isn't dealing so well with this bullshit even on good days. I repeat I don't want anyone feeling sorry for me, I'm not a victim - I'm just tired. And with the weariness comes a time when you just let both arms drop and go "fuck this shit!", get upset for a while, then you pick yourself up and keep going on.
It's not easy being around a fragile person. It's destabilizing. You don't know what to say or what to do, I know this because I have friends going through hard times too (some of them harder than I am) and it's paralyzing at times. How can I help besides listening and just being present in the moment, being there? If anyone has ideas I'm all ears. How can I be a better person no matter the shoes I'm wearing (supporter or supported)?
Where there is life, there is hope.
Be the light.
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