What is cancer fatigue?

The guilt at having just spent the entire day sleeping... UGH. Yep, I just lost another whole day to the void, it shouldn't bother me so much but I feel like my days are counted so wasting one is a big deal and I'm upset. I should be doing better, I should be stronger, what is wrong with me, why am I so lazy, why am I so damn tired all the time?

In these moments (those "am I normal?!" moments) Google is your friend:

Source: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/5230-cancer-fatigue

You may have expected to feel tired when you have cancer. But cancer fatigue can make you too exhausted to enjoy life. This type of extreme fatigue doesn’t get better with rest or sleep. Chemotherapy, radiation therapy and other cancer treatments can make cancer fatigue worse, as can depression and stress.

What is fatigue?

Fatigue can be confused with tiredness. Everyone gets tired. It's an expected feeling after certain activities or at the end of the day. Usually, we know why we're tired, and a good night's sleep will solve the problem.

Fatigue is different. Fatigue is a daily lack of energy — an unusual or excessive whole-body tiredness that is not relieved by sleep. It can be acute (lasting a month or less) or chronic (lasting from one to six months or longer). Fatigue can have a profoundly negative impact on a person's ability to function and quality of life.

What is cancer-related fatigue?

Cancer-related fatigue (CRF, sometimes simply called "cancer fatigue") is one of the most common side effects of cancer and its treatments. Many people who are chronically ill feel tired. But cancer-related fatigue goes beyond the usual tiredness. People who experience cancer fatigue often describe it as "paralyzing." Usually, it comes on suddenly and is not the result of activity or exertion. With this type of fatigue, no amount of rest or sleep helps. You feel physically, emotionally and mentally exhausted most of the time.

Cancer fatigue may last a few weeks (acute) or for months or years (chronic). Chronic cancer fatigue can harm your quality of life.

How common is cancer fatigue?

Cancer-related fatigue affects 80% to 100% of people with cancer.

What causes cancer fatigue?

Cancer treatments, including chemotherapy, radiation therapy, immunotherapy and surgery, can cause fatigue. These treatments can:

• Change how cells work.
• Cause inflammation.
• Make you nauseated and dehydrated.
• Change hormone levels.
• Damage tissues and cells.
• Reduce blood counts, leading to anemia.
• Stimulate the production of cytokines (toxic cell proteins).

The exact reason for cancer fatigue is unknown. Cancer fatigue may be related to both the disease process and treatments, including surgery, chemotherapy, radiation therapy and immunotherapy. Cancer treatments commonly associated with cancer fatigue are:

• Chemotherapy. Any chemotherapy drug may result in fatigue. This may vary from person to person. Some people say it lasts only a couple of days. Others feel the fatigue persists through and beyond the completion of treatment.
• Radiation therapy. Radiation therapy can cause cumulative fatigue (fatigue that increases over time). This can occur regardless of treatment site. Cancer fatigue usually lasts from 3-4 weeks after treatment stops, but can continue for up to 2-3 months.
• Immunotherapy. Immunotherapy stimulates your immune system to fight cancer. The treatment is also sometimes called biological therapy.

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When you facture in that my radiation treatments ended December 8th, I'm in that "fatigue & other crap" window - hmmm. Now that my brain knows this I hope it will stop making me feel so bad for having the energy of a box of hair. 

And yes I am taking daily chemo tablets and have immunotherapy infusions every two weeks as well. I really need to be gentler on myself and have patience - this too shall pass. I got shit to do, it NEEDS to pass!

Christmas was lovely, delicious, illuminating and heart-warming. Holidays are about family, connection and Love - sharing all of these is the reason for our being.

I hope you also made good memories for the locket in your heart. 

Happy holidays!